I need some time alone.

I am tired and I am lying to myself.

I feel unnatural and unfaithful to my own morals and beliefs. It frustrates me when I feel like I have to do something when I really don't. I give myself the perfect excuses, making it seem as if my actions are justified.

What have I done. It's implanted in my head so deep that I am starting to believe the lies that were told. I need some time alone. I'm in need of a vacation; I need to go somewhere. Maybe I can do what I had planned for last year with Amtrak. If anything, I just need to drive somewhere far.

Santa Cruz, you're not that far. Maybe I'll stop by, by the end of this month.